A LA CARTE COUPLES
Relationships in Post-modern Society
Manuel Villegas, Pilar Mallor
Manuel Villegas Besora (Barcelona, 1941) is a doctor in psychology and has been a professor at the University of Barcelona (UB) from 1974 to 2013. Founding partner and president of the Spanish Association of Cognitive Psychotherapies (ASEPCO) for more than a decade and director of the Journal of Psychotherapy, from its beginnings in 1990 to 2014. He also has long experience as an individual, group and couple therapist. His publications include 'Prometheus' Mistake', 'Prometheus on the couch' an...
Short ago, couples were set up with a pre-established script, which was to be followed to determinate concepts, regulations and even social rituals. In this way, whoever who was to be married knew perfectly which steps were to be taken and where they would bring them, just as the same way that a restaurant’s menu establishes and limits the class and sequence of the dishes that are served, without any kind of choice.
However, in the current situation of social and personal instability —changes in moral criteria, laxity in commitments and focusing on selfish and hedonistic short-term goals— have introduced new variables and personal preferences in the making of conjugal bonds. Thus, couples doesn’t adjust anymore to the established religious or social “menu” in order to make a “classical partnership”. Nowadays, they choose “à la carte” both the ingredients and the components of the relationship, according to the conceptual modality and life experience of the couple role they want to make.